Another birthday

I remember a time that I was so excited for my birthday to come, but after losing my dad my birthday became a sad reminder that I would never again hear the sound of his voice on the other end of the phone telling me happy birthday and love you, but I held onto the fact that I still had my mom.

Then last year my mother passed and my birthday came and instead of missing one I was missing both. This year I didn’t go all out or even get excited, instead of having my annual count down of my birthday is in ….. days, I just let the days pass.

As I woke this morning to the sound of my daughters voice saying happy birthday mommy, my heart melted with love but also sadness at not receiving the calls I so desperately wish I could get again. So I took to social media and wrote to them.

“It’s days like today that I will forever miss the sound of your voice on the other end of the phone or your messages to me telling me happy birthday, thank you for bringing me into this life and I know you are screaming from heaven happy birthday.” Now it probably wasn’t that put together as I was still half asleep, but you get the gist. Lol.

I know that there will be days that my heart aches for the ones I have lost that meant so much to me, but I’m also learning that I can not let my life pass me by, or allow myself to wallow in the pain. So today goes to celebrating my parents for bringing me into this life, and doing the best they could to raise me. One day we will be together again.

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